Costco is to me like oil is to vinegar

Does anyone else feel this way? Or am I the lone soldier out there that does not have an unconditional love for this store? I am completely perplexed by the world’s infatuation with this “shopping wonderland”. Really, can you use that entire four-pound jar of mayo before it expires? And only if you are serving hot dogs to 1000 people can you use up all three bottles of ketchup you are forced to buy.

A shopping trip should be relaxing, rather than stress-field, as you try to avoid those huge carts as they come straight at you or stop suddenly in front of you. Yes, those big carts, the ones that are so big they could hold a SMART car. And what happens if they move an item? Oh, now you’re screwed. Now, they’ve got you for an extra thirty minutes trapped in their “wonderland” as you search up and down every aisle trying to locate your item. Is there anyone you can quickly turn to for some exceptional customer service? Nope. Inevitably though, as you are standing in a checkout line of ten people deep, you see a gentleman unloading that specific item you searched unsuccessfully for, only to run up to him, beg him to tell you where he found it. Dilemma hits – do you run back and find that obscurely hidden item, losing your place in line; or do you forgot about it knowing that you’ll look for it on your next shopping trip, only to discover that the helpful customer service personal have moved it again.

But you know, they have us wrapped around their golden little finger. They know we’ll wait in line or spend two hours searching for the items on our list, always buying more than the actual number of items you came in the store for. Those impulse buys – “this is the best deal of the century” or “look at how this works – it’s amazing” or “we could really use this” -- those “super buys” – always make you drop more change than you saved.

Who really wants to spend their Saturday working-out? After all, pushing a cart that weighs the equivalent of three football players and loading and unloading and loading and unloading pounds is going to build some body muscle. For me, I like to go when I want to go, but since this store closes before the sun sets, they force you to go when it is probably the most inconvenient. I like to have the option to shop when the moon is up if I want or before it’s time for lunch.

I know you can save some money and it is convenient to purchase milk by the truck load and cases of diapers, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. I’ll probably be visiting Costco next week and for the weeks to come until we are empty-nesters. On second-thought, perhaps it’s a good thing that I can purchase alcohol there in bulk. :-)