Before Vanessa was born, I kept an accurate log of Katelyn’s latest milestone reached and recent achievement. Yes, she was my first child and like everyone always tells you, the number of pictures that your proceeding children will have of them will be drastically less than your first. To some degree I completely agree – dividing your time by more than one is a juggling act, but one that I was willing to fight. But there seems to have been a flurry of curve balls thrown into our lives over the last year and I am lucky if I can even record one achievement of each girl every few months.
This afternoon, I was snuggling with one of my two sick children and we were looking over a book she had pulled off of the shelf. It’s one of those books that you have…well, just so that you have it. I have never read it cover to cover and in fact, its topic really doesn’t interest me all that much. At some point while flipping through the pages, I came across this quote “We do not remember days, we remember moments” by Cesare Pavese.
For so long I have been caught up in capturing which exact day the girls reached a new milestone or accomplished a new task or said something fantastic. If I didn’t get the exact day down, then somehow I felt it wasn’t as special anymore, that the value of reaching that milestone has been compromised. I know that I hardly ever took note of how happy Katelyn was swimming with Daddy or the sense of accomplishment Vanessa must have felt when she realized that she could manage the top buckle on her car seat by herself. It was never important which day these events happened. The pure joy is what will forever be remembered, but is often overlooked. Watching the bond grow between a Daddy and his daughter or the feeling of pride in oneself is what should be remembered.
I know I won’t always remember all of the good time, heck I cannot remember what I ate for lunch today, but being present mentally in each of those moments while they happen is something that I cherish. I want to be able to look back at the days my children were young and see moments of joy. I know their baby books will probably never be completed, but I realize, now, that those are not the things that bring joy.
Since keeping the baby books up-to-date has gone out the window, I thought that maybe I would try to keep an occasional journal of the girls through this format. In addition, you get to see what’s new with each of them and see how they are growing and changing.
Katelyn, 3 years 6 months: You love to swim! This summer, you have spent a lot of time in the water. You can now go under the water holding your breath for a few seconds and are so very proud of yourself. You’ll be in the pool (the BIG pool, as you call it; not the little plastic kiddy pool) until I drag you out because you are shriving and starting to turn blue.
You continue to learn new signs, now knowing dozens and dozens. I am blessed that we started ASL with you as a baby, because the benefits of now being able to communicate with your sister are enormous. Your fascination with Curious George is still as strong as it was months ago. Lately, you go to sleep listening to a George story on CD and, in fact, now can repeat most of the story verbatim along with the CD. You love to do art projects – paint, color, stickers, play doh and glitter – anything that you can be creative with. You often are hosting tea parties and tending to your baby Emily. I was recently completing your preschool paperwork and they asked for one word to describe you. Do you know how hard that was? It took me a day to find just one word, and then even then, I don’t think it fully captures who you are, but at least it gives a glimpse. My response: imaginative.
Vanessa, 1 year 6 months: If I let you, you would spend your entire day in the swing. Swinging brings you so much peace, comfort and security. You are a climber – onto the kitchen table, the coffee table, your changing table. When there is music playing in the house, I’ll often find you standing on top of the coffee table dancing and clapping your hands.
You love your play slide – counting in sign 1-2-3 and then down you go. Bouncing on the big rubber ball brings smiles and laughter to your face. You are in a big-girl twin bed, something that we should have done a year ago, but who knew what a difference in your life it would make. Going to sleep is so much more peaceful (for Mommy and Daddy) and waking up to you quietly peaking out of your door is heavenly compared to the prior screaming to get you out of your crib. At gym class, your favorite activity is walking on the balance beam. You could care less about hanging from the bars or jumping on the air trap…but give you a beam and off you’ll go. Your understanding of language and ability to communicate is improving and I continue to see progress, which is reassuring. You have about 20 signs that you use on a regular basis and a few more that you understand but have yet to sign yourself. You are curious in nature, as long as you are in arms reach of Mommy or Daddy.
